fantastic fifty-two: weeks 41-52

on loop: tokimonsta – darkest dim

warning: first world, overly self-absorbed blipster problems to follow .. by the way, not a fan of “blipster” and not proud of myself for throwin it out there so cas. also, i miss happy endings.

after reading my last posts, i get that blogging is my first diaryish thing since tween years and a long-forgotten “i’m so happy to be in college, but have so many feeeelings” xanga account. i feel kinda odd about that. i subscribe to a few dozen blogs, and am glad my friend melissa convinced me to jump into the fray (i look at those turkey pics all the damn time, i swears), but by jeezy, it’s work! every couple weeks, i’ll think, “oh damn, i should’ve posted sumthin” then “i ain’t postin shat” and “you don’t know me! you don’t know my life.”

random commitment issues aside, it comes down to me being interesting to me, but surely not interesting enough to keep tens of people around the world entertained. i have to give thought to where my voice belongs later.

now, however, i am sticking to my goal to share a photo a week throughout 2013.

so, weeks 41-52 with a little captioning:

wk 41 – i wandered into a spongebob filming in downtown savannah. just to put it out there, those are two of my favorite things, and i acted a nut. i tiptoed in front of the cameraman and stopped. just stopped in the middle of his shoot like i’d caught a glimpse of patrick starfish himself until one of the assistants politely shooed me away. and i’d do it again! who doesn’t want to live in bikini bottom? if you’ve raised your hand, i consider you soulless.

WEEK 41wk 42 – my bff’s daughter’s one year bday party. my friend channeled her inner martha, making the cake, hangin decorations, getting an inflatable princess castle, and twirlin cotton candy. the entire event was too sweet, and baby girl smiled the whole time.

WEEK 42wk 43 – for halloween 2013, i thought i’d realize one of my long-time dreams of dressing like a flapper girl. this dress (damn you, piperlime!) dashed that dream immejiatley. i say immejiatley. the girls were squished and kept doin that kill bill “whimper” thing. i was like a black angry incredible hulk shedding clothes. but not near as cool as that sounds. after this massive disappointment, i flaked out on the costume party for leopold’s rum raisin / coffee w chocolate chips ice cream. i count myself the victor.

WEEK 43wk 44 – i went to the weeklong savannah film festival for my third year (dream to “start a tradition” … check), but for an awesome night, i hung out with two ladies who’ve somehow loved me for more than twenty years. who has those kind of friends?! happy & lucky.

the last filming on the last day of the film festival was jono oliver’s home:__ about a youngish man struggling with both external and internal turmoil trying to leave a mental care facility and get his own apartment. ohhhhhhh, the tears. afterwards, still full of tears and with raggedy hair from repeatedly yanking it during the movie, i got to meet writer/director/producer jono. he was warm, real, and seemed truly touched by my shyly telling him how much his debut film affected me. he was also surprisingly lickable. i have to work on my come hither eyes .. more on that later.

WEEK 44aWEEK 44b wk 45 – i worked a lot after taking the week off. leaving work one night, i took an amazing (to me) shot of the ramp. it gives me the feels.

WEEK 45wk 46 – i’m lucky both to know and be on this lady’s friend list. at a late baby shower for melissa, i got to see her be a naturally awesome mom .. sweet, but challenging to her kids. she went through seemingly neverending hurdles with her pregnancy, but you’d never know it to talk to her. i’m constantly inspired by the realness and two-steps forward thinking that’s also natural for her. an unexpected outcome of the shower (which i almost flaked out on!) was good conversation with other ladies and later, thinking about my 5 / 10-year plan for the first time. great times. no flakies.

WEEK 46wk 47 – so. steadman graham spoke about identity leadership. the speech was great. he was passionate, but abstract. problem is … he was tall. and slim. when i should’ve been paying attention, all i thought was, “this is a good looking man … i wonder if he notices oprah and i are the exact same height.” i practiced my come hither eye, but probably looked like i had a tick. crazy thoughts, i tell ya.

WEEK 47wk 48 – thanksgiving. food, fun, family. first major holiday since my aunt passed was a little bittersweet, but we photobombed our way through it.

WEEK 48wk 49 – i “volunteered” to watch my best friend’s baby while she and her hubby were in town for an event. so. i airquote “volunteered” because, as dr phil says, my expectations were totally violated. i thought he was the same as i remembered … a lap baby to hold dearly and watch crawl around on his chubby little hands and knees. don’t let the angelic face fool you … that little bugger is a big boy and wore me out! up the stairs, down the stairs, screams, tears, big mounds of poop. it was an eye-opening night. my best friend (his mom) is a saint.

WEEK 49wk 50 – this terrible phone-photo is me after a spinal tap (lumbar puncture). the procedure itself wasn’t bad, but the recovery was a b. back pain, headaches, neck stiffness, nausea. no bueno. took a week or so to get better, and my neck’s still wonky. i hope there aren’t more of those in my future. on a routine visit, my eye doctor caught swollen optic nerves which led to a case of “we haven’t the foggiest idea why” intercranial hypertension. in other words, all of my awesome can no longer be contained by my already big brain.

oh, and the trapper hat is what happens when you hang around my mom for too long. probably because i tell her things like the awesome brain (true) story.

WEEK 50wk 51 – having drinks after seeing dave chapelle (solid B performance – i’d give a B-, but never know what score +s and -s correlate with and have rejected them from my grading spectrum), we noted two friends-to-me-strangers-to-each-other dressed alike. picture worthy moment.

WEEK 51wk 52 – christmas!

i got three awesome gifts for christmas ….

a while back, my aunt mona started reupholstering chair cushions for me. since her passing, my roommate (in some ninja-like manner) got them recovered beautifully. on christmas, he left a note, “merry christmas from mona & david.” i could only cry for a while. and laugh and blubber and sit on my stairs (where this photo was taken). it’s the sweetest thing i can remember getting.

then, hilarity commenced with my extended family and, most beautifully, my little brother had a good christmas and gave us a few true LOLs.

WEEK 52a WEEK 52bbub

with that, fantastic fifty-two is over.

thanks for sticking with my ramblings and happy new year’s!

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sunday confessions – plus-sized pipes

sunday confession

“sometimes i’d like to be big … size 22+ big … so my voice goes from “can carry a note” to “damn, she SANG that song” because big ladies can blow. period.”



fantastic fifty-two: weeks 38-40

on loop: catching flies – don’t know how

(lucy pearl “dance tonight” sample .. oooh, loves)

we left off with family as catharsis

WEEK 38apparently it worked because since the family deep breath, people are trusting me to do all kinds of foolishness, most notably flying an airplane (what?!) and admiring savannah river views in convention centers before presenting to super-execs. my presentation pitch was unsuccessful, but it was cool to have a project on the radar of the company’s prez, CFO, CIO, and the rest of the alphabet soup-team.

WEEK 40WEEK 39on flying …

a friend is looking into getting a pilot’s license, and i, with no consideration of what it would entail, thought it’d be smart to tag along for flight lessons. couple things … flight lessons equaled me and pilot steve in a tiny tiny plane that i’d be flying (not observing in between pages of a harlequin romance novel).

in short, i was nervous and damn near threw up during descent. but …. i flew the damn thing! i don’t know what pilot steve smoked beforehand, but remember him saying during our flight, “i might get a little handsy to buckle you in, but it’s not that kinda party” … i LOVED this guy. he asked how much i wanted to do, and my exact words were, “any and everything besides make us die.” so, he took off, got us through a tough turn to avoid going into a military zone, and descended. i did everything in between. cuhrazy.

and addictive.

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sunday confessions – taste-testing gone wild

i had a sweet talk with my grandma and a randomly awesome cousin-cry that shifted my perspective and kicked us both out of funks

and there was this conversation …

my sixty-plus year old aunt unashamedly proclaimed that she steals fruit from the grocery store. not one grape, not even a few grapes, but she happily munches on full bags of grapes as she navigates the supermarket aisles. and small sweet plums. all under the guise of taste-testing with absolutely no shame in her game.

her “confession” cracked me up. and made me think of the many things we do – or want to do – when no one is watching.

things have gone so wrong so magnificently in recent years that conversations with my friends are spaced at infrequent intervals. by the time our schedules align for a phone call (also, i hate talking on the phone. it’s irrational), we’re all talked out after the basics … how are you, your family, your job, anyone gone psychotic, the weather, etc.

so, the internet will hear my confessions …

whenever i hear the word “kegel,” i automatically do kegels. i don’t know if there’s a way to measure my vajayjay’s improved elasticity and am too ashamed to google it”


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fantastic fifty-two: weeks 36 & 37

on loop: madonna – take a bow (my go-to sad song)

oooh it’s hard to take photos or otherwise pay attention to real and true things in the world when you’re all up in sadness.

it’s super easy to do some things though .. eating being #1 on my list